Eating Whatever You Want, Imagine That
Posted by Anne Cuthbert at 7/7/2008 10:17 AM and is filed under uncategorized 
A friend of mine noticed I was eating food she never dared allow
herself to eat because of the high calories it contained. She knows
about the work I do and that I eat whatever I want. This was the first
time she actually seemed to "get" that it really isn't about what
someone eats that causes them to be fat but how much. I always feel
excited about seeing this recognition because it is usually one of the
first steps in gaining freedom around food and hating your body. Of
course, it is sometimes a different story to actually implement it into
your life. Doing so can bring up a lot of fear. So, try it and let it
be scary. It's not like fear isn't a huge factor in how you do things
now, right?
herself to eat because of the high calories it contained. She knows
about the work I do and that I eat whatever I want. This was the first
time she actually seemed to "get" that it really isn't about what
someone eats that causes them to be fat but how much. I always feel
excited about seeing this recognition because it is usually one of the
first steps in gaining freedom around food and hating your body. Of
course, it is sometimes a different story to actually implement it into
your life. Doing so can bring up a lot of fear. So, try it and let it
be scary. It's not like fear isn't a huge factor in how you do things
now, right?
Body image has always been a problem for me thin or fat. I grew up in a the sixties when all the teen magazines started coming out with Twiggie and the blond blue eyed modles setting the image for young woman. I'm Italian and was never really thin unless I starved myself. Being very athletic growing up kept my weight down but as I grew older and had children I, at one point, blew up to 260 lbs. I have lost 100 pounds and feel great and look pretty good for a 53 year old. I am still athletic. But when I look in the mirror I still see a fat woman. I suffer from self critisism and it is not good. No matter how thin I get I always feel and think I am fat. How can I change the perseption in the mirror? Sometimes I think I look so bad I don't want to leave my house. I suffer depression because I think I can never messure up to what society thinks a woman should look like. My husband left me for a younger woman because he said I was too fat and not the pretty girl I was when he married me. I just want to be able to look in the mirror and like what I see and feel confident about who I am.
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Hi Camille,
What you write is something that most women, I think, can relate to. With eating disorder and body image issues, we tend to think and feel fat rather than accepting ourselves for who we are. I hear that part of you does feel good about how you look and part of you doesn't. I think that the part of you that doesn't, is the part of you that feels hurt about your husband leaving you, feels bad because you think you can't measure up, and probably many other emotions.
Try this exercise: look in the mirror and notice how you feel toward your body. Then, see if you can look beyond that and see in the mirror a woman who is hurt, sad, feels shame for not being good enough, etc.; notice whatever comes up. Your feelings about your body are about the feelings you have inside. When you heal that, you won't need to take it out on your body and therefore will just see your body in the mirror looking back at you... a body that can move, walk, jump, stretch play, etc.
Anne
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Hi,
I have been reading your newsletter since the beginning. A friend referred me to it. I must say I have learned a lot about why I eat too much and how to change my style of eating, even my perspective on food.
Thanks for all the good information and now, thanks for giving me the chance to than you.
Keep up the good work. I enjoy every issue.
Bob
Reply to this
Hi Bob,
Thanks for the feedback on my newsletters. I am glad you have been learning about yourself from them!
Please let me know if there is a topic you would like covered. I am open to suggestions as I want the content to be helpful to you and the rest of the readers.
Of course, the blog is also a great way to get questions answered fast. Thanks for participating.
Take care,
Anne
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