Imagine two continuums.   The first one is body size.  The second one is how you feel toward your body.

There is a belief in our society that if you are high on the body size continuum, you are also high on the negative body image continuum.  Thus, if you lose weight, you feel better about your body (and yourself and your life). 

If you are reading this now, you probably have realized it just doesn't work this way. 

I have met many thin people who hate their body, feel afraid of being fat, judge everything they eat, and constantly think about food and how they look.  These people are not happy despite being thin. 

It is rare, but I have also met people who are not the ideal body size (anywhere else on the continuum) and yet they feel great in their bodies.  They eat what they want, they wear clothes that fit and they feel great wearing, they believe they are loved for who they are, rather than how they look (despite all the ads telling them otherwise).  They feel great on the inside and people are drawn to them because of it.  These people are happy despite being fat.

Learning to love your body just the size it is is not about losing weight.  It is about being comfortable with your emotions... feeling things.  At first, it is about healing old stuff then it is about just letting feelings happen as they come up.

Your feelings toward your body (fear of gaining weight, anger at eating too much, shame at how you look, etc) are about the emotions.  In other words, take away the "of gaining weight", "at eating too much", "at how you look" and you are left with: fear, anger, shame.  That is what it is about.  Feel your feelings and you won't need to turn against your body to avoid them.

Of course, it isn't necessarily so simple, is it?  We don't do feelings well in our society.  I could go on and on about this but will save it for another time. 

Any thoughts (or feelings) on this?  Please let us know.

Anne