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Dawn's Story

2010-02-17T21:34:00Z

"The Immense Hole in My Heart"

by Dawn

"On Monday, February 8th, 55 years ago, a little girl was born. Her life was dependent upon the care she received from her mother and her husband, the man she knew as her "father" for the first 17 years of her life. The 3 of them lived on a Navel Air Base, in Chincoteague, VA, the Island of the Wild Ponies.

Later on, I would dream of nothing else but these free spirits racing with the wind, against the incoming tide. I read every book I could find inspired by these wonderful creatures, drew nothing but horses, and even penned a novel or two of my own, which I boldly submitted book reports on, under an alias, of course!

I learned, at an early age, the art of escape.

I somehow knew at two years old to create a way to block out my feelings, in order to survive. During the abuse I honed in on the skills of "leaving my body", which by the way, was brilliant, but afterwards the intense feeling of shame would overcome me, and I had to fight long and hard not to feel that. Soon I learned to stuff it away, with food. I was petrified of my feelings, and so began a life long journey of avoiding them.

The joyful ones were welcomed, and mostly present during the years of raising my three children. Like any life lived, there were times frought with pain and anguish, as well. I was still an escape artist, but my methods no longer worked as well, I needed more.
So I went on a journey, and in my late 30's I found therapy and God, not exactly in that order, but that's not what mattered.
What mattered was that I now had the knowledge of why I ran away from my intense feelings, and the courage to begin facing them.
Through the years the thing I stuggled to remember that when pain strikes again, and it always will, I have a choice.
If I choose to stuff my feelings, it only helps to create more bad feelings, on top of the ones I'm desperately trying to extinguish.

This morning I was unable to get out of bed, I had an immense hole in my heart left over from a failed relationship with someone I deeply loved. It was then that I spoke with my enlightened daughter, who reminded me to "surrender." There's peace in giving up, to stop warring with oneself.

For today, I won't run from my intense feelings. Even grief changes from day to day. And life really does go on, especially for those with a free and somewhat wild spirit.

Peace...Dawn"

Emily's Story

2010-02-09T00:57:00Z

"I’m Fat"
By Emily S.

"I’m 27 years old, I’m originally from New York, I love horror movies and musical theater, I have 2 cats and a boyfriend and (like the title says), I’m fat. You may be wondering why I chose to tell you I was fat, before anything else about me. It’s pretty simple, really. For 20 of my 27 years, the fact that I’m fat has been the single most important thing in my life. Everything else has come second.

My mother, like most parents, has always wanted what was best for me. When she was a child, she had weight problems of her own. She was teased about her weight for years. She finally did lose weight in high school, only to have other eating disorders later in life. So, understandably, my mother wanted to do her best to prevent me from having the same hardships.

But when I was about 7, I also started getting teased about my weight. And at first I had enough confidence to stick up for myself when I was confronted with bullies. (“You’re a fat red tomato!” “Oh yeah? Well, you’re a skinny string bean!”) After a while, the teasing and bullying started to wear me down, and my mother decided to try and help me. At least, in her mind, she thought she was helping me.

What my mother decided to do, was to make food my enemy. We didn’t have snack foods in the house. We hardly ever had dessert after dinner. If I wanted a second helping, it usually ended in a fight. If I wanted to eat junk food, I was made to feel horribly guilty about it. These foods are BAD. These foods are GOOD. If you eat the BAD foods then you are BAD. Of course, I quickly learned, that these rules only applied to me. My dad could take second helpings. My brother could eat chocolate. My mother would go as far as to actually hide food from me, so that my brother and dad could eat it.

But this wasn’t enough. She started taking me to as many different places to get me to lose weight. We went to my pediatrician, who warned me of the dangers of heart disease and high cholesterol and diabetes. I think I was about 10 years old when we had that talk. We went to Weight Watcher’s meetings. Overeaters Anonymous meetings. The local YMCA gym. A psychologist. A nutritionist. And so forth.

My mother was so concerned about my weight, that she made my weight the defining characteristic of my entire existence. It wasn’t just that I was fat. It was that I was fat and we had to fix it. It wasn’t okay that I was fat. *I* wasn’t okay. I was wrong and bad and shameful and I didn’t deserve anything good until we fixed me. My mother loved me, of course. I never doubted that. But if I was thin, then she would love me just a little more. At least that’s how it felt.

Eventually, my mother’s determination for me to lose weight was absorbed into my own determination. It wasn’t just that she was telling me that I was wrong and bad and we needed to fix it. After a few years, I believed it completely. My self-esteem plummeted. I had no confidence in myself, and I truly believed myself to be worthless and undeserving of anything positive. Because, you see, I was bad. I was wrong and bad and I hadn’t fixed myself yet. And until I could fix myself, I was just wasting space.

But I couldn’t fix it. I tried for years and years to lose weight, and I could never do it. Sure, I might lose a few pounds here, a few pounds there. A few times, I actually did lose a considerable amount of weight. But eventually, it came back. It always came back. And then I would feel even worse than I did before. How could I have let myself get fat again? I should know better by now!

It was only this past year, that I think I finally figured it out. As a child, your parents are everything. The saying goes something like, “Mother is God in the eyes of a child.” If my mother told me I was fat and that it was wrong and we had to fix it, then clearly that must be the truth. But somewhere deep down, I didn’t believe it. And I was mad. I was mad because she was convincing me of something that was a lie. Being fat is not WRONG and it is not BAD. It is not a defining characteristic. It is one thing, not everything.

I now believe that deep down in my subconscious, I’ve been rebelling against my mother’s voice that has been telling me I need to be thin to be worth something. I haven’t been sabotaging my desire to lose weight, because it was never my desire in the first place. It was my mother’s. I just wanted to eat a doughnut every now and then. My constant struggle between eating the foods I want, and feeling guilty about eating the foods I want, is really just a 20 year long argument (in my head) between my mother and my 7 year old self.

I’m not a parent yet, but I can understand the gut-wrenching determination to do what’s best for your child no matter what. But sometimes, what is best for your child, is to just let them be. Guide them, and support them, and let them know every day that you love them completely and unconditionally. But let them make their own choices. Let them make their own mistakes. Let them decide what they want their defining characteristic to be. Even though it’s hard to resist the urge to step in and help them along the way, it’s important to let them ask you for your help.

I may never have a normal relationship with my mother. I may never feel 100% comfortable eating in front of her. I will probably always be a little sad about that. But at least I can better understand how I got where I am now, and who I’ve become. And if I can help save someone else’s relationship with their mother, I think that would be enough."

Size Acceptance

2009-12-10T22:46:00Z

When I see videos like this, I believe more and more that there is a Revolution regarding Size Acceptance! Thank you Joy Nash for reminding women of all shapes and sizes that they are beautiful and to live and enjoy life, no matter what your size. See for yourself:
A Fat Rant.

Weight Bias - In an area it should never be

2009-10-28T23:59:00Z

Hello,

This video is a great enactment of weight discrimination in health care professionals. I think it is a great watch.... a must see.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lZLzHFgE0AQ

Let me know what you think...

NoBody but My Body Weekend Workshop

2009-09-22T23:03:00Z

I haven't blogged anything in SO long! Sorry about that. I suppose I have been busy creating and preparing or my upcoming workshop, which I'll be co-leading with a long-time friend and colleague, Cortney. We are so excited about it!

The workshop is a safe place to go deeper with and heal your feeling toward food and your body. As well, it will give you a place to share your feelings and experience with others, thus, lessening the shame! I hope you can join us!

For more information, go to the Events page on my website

BMI - NOT a measure of health

2009-07-09T23:56:00Z

I remember being given body fat tests in highschool. What a horrible experience! These test were just slightly worse than the Presidential Fitness Tests they would give... how many pull ups, laps, etc. can you do... tested in front of all your classmates. No wonder I wanted to starve myself back then!

I suppose the body fat test was intended to tell the nurse if I was healthy or not. Funtunately, I have come to realize that the BMI charts are BS. The below article, which someone pointed me toward, tells more about why.

My message about BMI... don't pay any attention to it! But, you decide for yourself...

Top 10 Reasons Why the BMI is Bogus, by Keith Devlin (article found on npr.org)

Americans keep putting on the pounds — at least according to a report released this week from the Trust for America's Health. The study found that nearly two-thirds of states now have adult obesity rates above 25 percent.

But you may want to take those findings — and your next meal — with a grain of salt, because they're based on a calculation called the body mass index, or BMI.

As the Weekend Edition math guy, I spoke to Scott Simon and told him the body mass index fails on 10 grounds:

1. The person who dreamed up the BMI said explicitly that it could not and should not be used to indicate the level of fatness in an individual.
The BMI was introduced in the early 19th century by a Belgian named Lambert Adolphe Jacques Quetelet. He was a mathematician, not a physician. He produced the formula to give a quick and easy way to measure the degree of obesity of the general population to assist the government in allocating resources. In other words, it is a 200-year-old hack.

2. It is scientifically nonsensical.
There is no physiological reason to square a person's height (Quetelet had to square the height to get a formula that matched the overall data. If you can't fix the data, rig the formula!). Moreover, it ignores waist size, which is a clear indicator of obesity level.

3. It is physiologically wrong.
It makes no allowance for the relative proportions of bone, muscle and fat in the body. But bone is denser than muscle and twice as dense as fat, so a person with strong bones, good muscle tone and low fat will have a high BMI. Thus, athletes and fit, health-conscious movie stars who work out a lot tend to find themselves classified as overweight or even obese.

4. It gets the logic wrong.
The CDC says on its Web site that "the BMI is a reliable indicator of body fatness for people." This is a fundamental error of logic. For example, if I tell you my birthday present is a bicycle, you can conclude that my present has wheels. That's correct logic. But it does not work the other way round. If I tell you my birthday present has wheels, you cannot conclude I got a bicycle. I could have received a car. Because of how Quetelet came up with it, if a person is fat or obese, he or she will have a high BMI. But as with my birthday present, it doesn't work the other way round. A high BMI does not mean an individual is even overweight, let alone obese. It could mean the person is fit and healthy, with very little fat.

5. It's bad statistics.
Because the majority of people today (and in Quetelet's time) lead fairly sedentary lives and are not particularly active, the formula tacitly assumes low muscle mass and high relative fat content. It applies moderately well when applied to such people because it was formulated by focusing on them. But it gives exactly the wrong answer for a large and significant section of the population, namely the lean, fit and healthy. Quetelet is also the person who came up with the idea of "the average man." That's a useful concept, but if you try to apply it to any one person, you come up with the absurdity of a person with 2.4 children. Averages measure entire populations and often don't apply to individuals.

6. It is lying by scientific authority.
Because the BMI is a single number between 1 and 100 (like a percentage) that comes from a mathematical formula, it carries an air of scientific authority. But it is mathematical snake oil.

7. It suggests there are distinct categories of underweight, ideal, overweight and obese, with sharp boundaries that hinge on a decimal place.
That's total nonsense.

8. It makes the more cynical members of society suspect that the medical insurance industry lobbies for the continued use of the BMI to keep their profits high.
Insurance companies sometimes charge higher premiums for people with a high BMI. Among such people are all those fit individuals with good bone and muscle and little fat, who will live long, healthy lives during which they will have to pay those greater premiums.

9. Continued reliance on the BMI means doctors don't feel the need to use one of the more scientifically sound methods that are available to measure obesity levels.
Those alternatives cost a little bit more, but they give far more reliable results.

10. It embarrasses the U.S.
It is embarrassing for one of the most scientifically, technologically and medicinally advanced nations in the world to base advice on how to prevent one of the leading causes of poor health and premature death (obesity) on a 200-year-old numerical hack developed by a mathematician who was not even an expert in what little was known about the human body back then.

Operation Beautiful

2009-07-03T02:01:00Z

I received the below email today and knew I had to share it. I later found the blog of the person who started "Operation Beautiful," Caitlin Boyle. Thank you Caitlin... for reminding all women that we are beautiful!

Read on and then visit her blog: www.OperationBeautiful.com

"This is not a trick post; you are beautiful
About 8 or 10 years ago, I went to the ladies' room in my favorite bar one night and discovered some new graffiti as I went to wash my hands. "This is not a trick mirror," it said, with an arrow pointing down toward my face. "You are beautiful." I smiled at first, and then, before I knew it, actually choked up a bit. (Um, I might have been drinking.) At the time, I was struggling daily with my body image, as I had pretty much every day since I hit puberty. I think it was the construction of the message that really got to me, the presumption that I -- and every woman who passed through there -- would look in that mirror and see a beautiful face, but wonder whether that first impression was trustworthy. For most of the women I knew, our experience with mirrors was usually the opposite: We'd look and immediately start cataloguing every flaw, only questioning our judgment if we happened to catch a glimpse of something not so bad. Seeing that thought process turned on its head had a far more powerful effect than I would have expected.

Caitlin Boyle of Orlando is on a mission to give every woman in America a moment like that, only minus the destruction of property. A few weeks ago, she wrote "You are beautiful" on a Post-It note and stuck it on a public bathroom mirror. She posted about it on her blog, and soon after, her readers had sent in over 100 stories and photos of their own body-positive evangelization via Post-It. Thus, Operation Beautiful was born. Women all over the country are sticking the notes on diet books in stores, on gym lockers, on doctors' scales. Not just "You are beautiful," but "Stop judging yourself" and "Yes, your butt looks great in those jeans" and "Remember, a muffin top does not mean you are a bad person." On a drugstore display of the weight loss drug Alli (pronounced "ally," because we all need someone in our corner who makes us poop our pants in the pursuit of thinness), someone left the message "Treat yourself as you would treat a friend." Nice.

The cumulative effect of seeing all those notes in one place does eventually go from inspiring to sort of cheesy and banal; after you've read the words "You are beautiful" a couple dozen times, they start to lose power. But still, I know from experience that seeing a message like that in an unexpected location really can smack you in your perfectly fine face and make you wonder why you spend so much time hating your body. And just as importantly, the women leaving the notes report that the act of writing these thoughts down has a positive effect on them, too. One wrote to Boyle, "I've really been struggling with my body image lately, and after posting the note, I started sobbing during my run because I realized that that note applies to me just as much as anyone else." As women, we're conditioned both to avoid speaking positively about our own looks, for fear of being thought egotistical (or worse, judged delusional), and to compete with other women in some imaginary, winner-takes-all beauty race. The anonymity and randomness of this project -- the very things that might make the messages seem meaningless at first -- are what give it power. The Post-Its allow us to tell each other what we can't say in polite company: that you, fellow woman, are not my enemy. You are a beautiful human being -- and you and you and you and you and you, too. And hey, how 'bout that, so am I."

Book Review and Recommendation

2009-05-26T19:41:00Z

"One magical night in June of 1998 twenty-nine million Americans went to bed with average figures and woke up fat. They woke up with a presumed increased risk of type 2 diabetes, hypertension, and atherosclerosis and a government prescription for weight loss. Of course, nobody gained a pound. The task force had simply lowered obesity standards, a change which was obviously favorable for private industry."
-Linda Bacon, Ph.D.

I haven’t written a book review since high school. I hope that the fact that I am writing this now will speak to my enthusiasm and passionate encouragement that you run, not walk, to find and read this book. Health at Every Size: The Surprising Truth about Your Weight by Linda Bacon, Ph.D. is a remarkable book, perfect for anyone struggling with body image, yo-yo dieting, as well as anyone with an interest in food and weight issues.

Dr. Bacon begins her book by encouraging the reader to stop dieting and instead begin the process of learning to listen to one’s own physical hunger cues. She goes on to explain biological reasons why diets don’t work. Her arguments are well explained, thorough and based in extensive research. Dr. Bacon tells us why our bodies biologically are set up to resist weight loss and promote weight gain. She shares how our biology helps us to stay healthy and that dieting helps convince our bodies even further the importance of putting on the pounds.

We have all heard that being fat is unhealthy. Dr. Bacon reports that there are no studies that actually find this to be true. She tells the reader about the culprits of reporting this false message and those who have gained financial wealth by promoting this idea. Dr. Bacon encourages the reader to be angry with the diet industry, the food industry, the government and all others that promote this principle… rather than being angry with ourselves for failing yet another diet that never had a chance of succeeding!

Dr. Bacon is all too familiar with the diet mentality. While she talks about nutrition in her book, she also warns the reader to proceed with caution. She is aware that some readers may use the nutrition section as a way to continue dieting and obsessing about food. She suggests skipping this chapter when appropriate to support healthy choices by first learning to listen to one’s own physical cues and to enjoy the pleasures of food, before nutritional concerns.

The last sections of the book discuss a study Dr. Bacon and her colleagues performed to demonstrate the Health at Every Size Program she created. Dr. Bacon encourages her readers to learn about mindful eating, paying attention to hunger and satiety cues, applying the hunger scale and how to address emotional eating. In her study, she showed that the Health at Every Size group didn’t lose weight (neither did the diet group) but felt better about themselves, their bodies and enjoyed greater physical activity.

Dr. Bacon has a doctorate in physiology, specializing in weight regulation, as well as graduate degrees in psychology, specializing in eating disorders and body image, and kinesiology, specializing in exercise metabolism. She is currently a nutrition professor in the Biology Department at City College of San Francisco and serves as an associate nutritionist at the University of California, Davis.

I believe that the most important message in Dr. Bacon’s book is that being fat is not bad, nor is it unhealthy. A relatively unheard of belief, Dr. Bacon tackles it well and encourages us to think differently about dieting and health. She challenges discrimination against fat people and encourages size acceptance. On Dr. Bacon’s website (http://www.haescommunity.orgshe shares the philosophy of the "new peace movement: Health at Every Size is based on the simple premise that the best way to improve health is to honor your body. It supports people in adopting health habits for the sake of health and well-being (rather than weight control)." On this website, she encourages all to take a pledge to be part of the Health at Every Size (HAES) community. I took the pledge. I think that after reading her book, you will too.

(The book can be purchased by going on-line at: http://www.lindabacon.org/HAESbook)

5 Steps Toward a Diet Free Life

2009-04-16T23:00:19Z

This new podcast is provided to those who sign up for my monthly newsletter. I thought I would also post it here for those who prefer not to sign up for the monthly newsletter or for those who are signed up but would also like the podcast version.

I hope you enjoy it!
Anne

Stop being a Fattist

2009-03-07T08:13:00Z

I admit it, I am on an anti-Fattist kick these days. My new passion seems to be learning about and pointing out to others evidence and information contrary to the popular belief that being thin is good and being fat is bad.

I really want our society to change their thinking around this! I believe this will go far in eliminating not only prejudice and discrimination against fat people but also eating disorders and body image issues.

I simply ask you to think critically, to read other opinions out there, to decide for yourself what is true for you. I will help by providing articles, quotes, postings that give other opinions that are out there, but not as easy to find.

Click on the title link for an article written by a nutritionist called "Stop Being a Fattist."

After you read it, if you want to tell me your thoughts, please do.

Anne

5 Health Care Myths

2009-02-25T00:53:00Z

I recently discovered another website that provides great "research on obesity, eating disorders, dieting, weight loss or gain – and Guidelines for Healthy Living at Any Size" called Healthy Weight Network. Check them out!

On this website, I found "5 Health Care Myths", which I have intuitively known but didn't have the research information to discuss it. Therefore, I am printing their information here. At the time of this writing, the pdf version was available from the home page of the website.

5 HEALTH CARE MYTHS
by Francie M. Berg

Many health professionals today have moved on to a healthy living approach of sound and compassionate care in dealing with weight issues. Unfortunately, however, many others promote and provide care that is based on misinformation, myth and size bias, rather than accurate and up-to-date scientific information. Consider these myths and controversies:

Myth #1. Obesity causes severe health risks. Unknown, but it seems doubtful. Obesity has been associated with in the past and assumed to cause a higher risk for type 2 diabetes, hypertension and cardiovascular disease. More recent federal research questions this. The evidence indicates these risks, as well as obesity itself, are likely caused by other factors, especially genetics and inactivity. (Increased physical activity dramatically reduces risk without weight loss.) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

Myth #2. Thinner is healthier. False. The lowest death rate according to the latest federal research is within the "overweight" range (BMI of 25 to 29.9) and up to BMI 35. Lower weight and extremes of higher weight are linked to increased risk in a "U" curve. This confirms much earlier research, including a 1998 review of 236 controlled studies by the National Institutes of Health that found the lowest risk associated with a BMI of about 25 to 27. (Despite this evidence from their own studies, federal agencies continue to define normal or healthy weight at a much lower point, a BMI of only 18.5 to 24.9.) 8, 9, 10

Myth #3. Losing weight reduces risk. False. Long-term studies indicate higher risk with weight loss. Higher death rates weight loss are shown by more than 15 large comprehensive studies, including the Fram-ingham Heart Study, Harvard Alumni Study and NHANES follow-up. Researchers suggest the loss of lean mass from bones, muscle, heart and organs may be jeopardizing health, especially for older people.11, 12, 13, 14, 15

Myth #4. Obese people can lose weight safely and permanently. False. No current methods are proven safe and effective; all can be considered experimental. Dieting causes short-term weight loss lasting no more than six months, followed by regain, and leads to food preoccupation, bingeing, dysfunctional eating and sometimes eating disorders; also it causes weight cycling, a known mortality risk. Drugs offer only minimal weight loss (5-11 pounds) and must be taken long-term, with increased risk; of 6 million adults who took fen-phen/Redux, FDA reports one-third developed leaky heart valves, some fatal, and others died of primary pulmonary disease. Gastric surgery carries risk of nearly 5% mortality rate in the first year (nearly 50% death rate for age 75 and over) in a recent Medicare study, as well as over 60 complications, including severe infection, leaks, blood clots and malnutrition.16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22

Myth #5. Scaring people about overweight promotes weight loss and obesity prevention, and does no harm. False. Research shows that the increasing pressures to lose weight over the past 30 years are paralleled by increases in obesity. Far from doing no harm, these pressures appear to have backfired and led to widespread nutrient deficiencies, dangerous weight loss efforts, eating disorders, malnutrition, occasional deaths, body hatred and size harassment. 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29

These five myths benefit, not the public or health community, but primarily the weight loss industry. The fiction the myths keep alive is that overweight is a severe health risk that threatens most adults and adds greatly to health care costs; therefore, weight loss is urgently needed – even when unsafe and ineffective. A more appropriate healthy living approach emphasizes moderate and regular activity, normal eating without dieting, acceptance, respect, and physical, emotional and spiritual well-being for children and adults of all sizes.

References
1. Taylor R. Causation of Type 2 diabetes – The Gordian knot unravels. N Engl J Med 2004;350:639-641. 2. Miller W. Health promotion strategies for obese patients. Healthy Weight J 1997:11:3:47-51. 3. Blair SN, Kohl HW, Barlow CE. Physical activity, physical fitness, and allcause mortality in women: do women need to be active? J Am Coll Nutr 1993;12(4):368371. 4. Barlow CE, Kohl HW III, Gibbens LW, Blair SN. Physical fitness, mortality and obesity. Int J Obesity 1995;1 (Suppl 4):S41-44. Miller W. Health promotion strategies for obese patients. Healthy Weight J 1997:11:3:47-51. 5. Blair SN, Bodney S. Effects of physical inactivity and obesity on morbidity and mortality: Current evidence and research issues. Medicine and Science in Sports and Exercise 1999;31:S646-S662. 6. Flegal KM, Graubard BI, et al. Excess deaths associated with underweight, overweight, and obesity. JAMA 2005;293:1861-1867. 7. Berg F. Underage and Overweight: Our Childhood Obesity Crisis – What Every Family Needs to Know, 2005, 2004, p13-29. New York: Hatherleigh Press. 8. Flegal KM. JAMA 2005;293:1861-1867. 9. NIH-NHLBI Clinical Guidelines on Identification, Evaluation, and Treatment of Overweight and Obesity. National Institutes of Health, National Heart, Lung, and Blood Institute. Pre-print June 1998. Bethesda, MD. 10. Berg F. Underage and Overweight, p147-151. 11. NIH Technology assessment conference: Methods for voluntary weight loss and control. Conference report: program and abstracts. March 30-April 1, 1992. Office Medical Research, Bethesda, MD 20892. 12. Andres R, Muller DC, Sorkin JD. Long-term effects of change in body weight on all-cause mortality: a review. Ann Intern Med 1993;119:737-743. 13. Williamson DF, Pamuk E, Thun M, et al. Prospective study of intentional weight loss and mortality in never-smoking overweight US white women aged 40-64 years. Am J Epidemiol 1995;141:1128-1141. 14. Allison DB, Zannolli R, Faith MS, et al. Weight loss increases and fat loss decreases all-cause mortality rate: results from two independent cohort studies. I J Obesity 1999;23:603-611. 15. Berg F. Underage and Overweight, p13-29, 156-194. 16. NIH Technology assessment conference: Methods for voluntary weight loss and control. March 30-April 1, 1992. 17. Lee IM, Paffenbarger RS Jr. Is weight loss hazardous? Nutr Rev 1996;54(suppl):S116-124. 18. Kassirer JP, Angell M. Losing weight: An illfated New Year’s resolution. N Engl J Med 1998;338:5254. 19. Garner DM, Wooley SC. Confronting the failure of behavioral and dietary treatments for obesity. Clin Psych Rev 1991;11:729-780. 20. Lissner L, Odell P, et al. Variability of body weight and health outcomes in the Framingham population. New Engl J Med 1991;324:1839-44. 21. Flum DR, Salem L, et al. Early Mortality Among Medicare Beneficiaries Undergoing Bariatric Surgical Procedures JAMA 2005;294:1903-1908. 22. Berg F. Underage and Overweight, p156-194. 23. Third report on nutrition monitoring in the US, Vol 1-2, Dec 1995. Life Sciences Research Office, US Health/Human Serv, US Dept of Agriculture. Natl Ctr for Health Statistics, NHANES III. Advance Data Nov 14, 1994. 24. Levine P. President’s message. Eating Disorders Awareness and Prevention Newsletter. Spring 1995:1-3. 25. Pipher M. Reviving Ophelia. 1994. Ballantine Books, Random House, NY. 26. Fallon P, M Katzman, S Wooley, edits. Feminist perspectives on eating disorders. 1994. Guilford Press, NY. 27. Grange D, J Tibbs, J Selibowitz. Eating attitudes, body shape, and self-disclosure in adolescent girls and boys. Eating Dis 1995:3:3:253-264. 28. Smolak L, M Levine. Toward an empirical basis for primary prevention of eating problems with elementary school children. Eat Disorders 1994;2:4:293-307. 29. Berg F. Underage and Overweight, p76-94, 195-205.

Reprinted and adapted from Underage and Overweight: Our Childhood Obesity Crisis – What Every Family Needs to Know, by Frances M. Berg, M.S. New York: Hatherleigh Press. Copyright 2008, 2005, 2004 by Frances M. Berg. All rights reserved. The author permits use of this feature as a handout or in nonprofit newsletters for educational purposes, provided it is reproduced in its entirety with this citation. Written permission is required for use in books or publications for sale. Contact Healthy Weight Network, 402 S. 14th St., Hettinger, ND 58639 (701-567-2646; fax 701-567-2602). www.healthyweight.net

National Eating Disorder Awareness Week is February 22-28

2009-02-17T21:49:00Z

Hello!

In honor of Eating Disorder Awareness Week, I wanted to inform you of some events that I know about in the Portland area. If you live in another location, please look on line for events in your area and/or visit the National Eating Disorder Association Website.

Bathroom Scale Turn-In and Scale Art Party, Saturday, February 21, 12 to 2pm
Be Nourished is having their very first bathroom scale turn-in day! Come drop them off, decorate them and visit with us! In Honor of Eating Disorders Awareness Week. Bring your friends, kids, parents, anyone!

Miss Fit, 1110 NE Glisan (parking available on the street, not in the parking lot)

What to Bring: Your pesky scale and any partners in crime. We will provide art supplies (unless there is something special you would like to bring).

Open House, Saturday, February 28, 3 to 6pm (Be Nourished)
Our open house will feature the Scale Art and Fritz Liedtke's photo-documentary about the lives affected by eating disorders titled Skeleton in the Closet. Enjoy delicious food, meet our practitioners, and stay for a chair massage. Bring your friends, kids, parents, anyone!

3808 N Williams, Ste F (located in The Hub, the same building as Yoga Shala)

Let us know you are coming: info@benourished.org or call 503.288.4104

Fat Boy

2009-02-10T00:40:00Z

As I was driving up to Seattle this past weekend, I was playing Jewel's album "Spirit". I am a big fan of this CD as it has many great songs about life and living. Her album is dedicated to her mother and partner who are examples to her of "what it means to be the difference and to all of you who are being the difference in our world."

One of the songs on the album is titled "Fat Boy" I wanted to share the lyrics with all of you:

Fat boy goes to the pool
Sees his reflection, doesn't know what to do
He feels little inside and filled with pride
Oh, fragile flame
No one sees the same
Fat boy goes about his day
Trying to think of funny things to say
Like, "This is just a game I play"
And "I like me this way"
Oh, fragile flame
When no one feels the same
Hush, sleep, don't think, just eat
Your daddy's little boy
Your mama's pride and joy
You know they love ya
But not because they hold ya
Fat boy says "Wouldn't it be nice
If I could melt myself like ice
Or outrun my skin and just be pure wind
Oh, fragile flame
Sometimes I feel the same

Oprah's Confession

2009-01-27T22:22:00Z

Many people told me about Oprah's weight loss confession on her show January 5, 2009. I didn't see the show myself, but those who told me about it expressed a feeling of validation in hearing her struggle. Later, I found part of the show clip and a write up about her confession on her website. I too was moved by her vulnerability and sharing of her pain with this issue.

If you pay any attention to Oprah, you have seen her weight change, several times over several years. Oprah is a yo-yo dieter. She acknowledged and recognized that her issues are emotional. She talked about her weight and food challenges being related to a "hunger for balance" due to "too much work and not enough play." I applaud Oprah for acknowledging this for herself as well as sharing it so vulnerably with us! As a friend of mine put it, "Oprah can afford any diet or diet pill in the world. If there was a weight loss secret, she would know about it."

However, I don't think Oprah does fully get it...yet, that is. I think the process of confronting the emotional issues of food and body image land on a continuum. It takes some time to let go of dieting and to really deal with the underlying issues. Oprah is still on a diet and, I think, will therefore continue to focus her problem on her weight, not on better life balance. That is okay; that is where she is with her process. And, I hope that Oprah will some day stop dieting. I think that if she did, she would find a way to enjoy her life, her body, and her success more. Imagine the role model she would be to millions! Perhaps she could be a key factor in ending the dieting cycle that teaches us to hate our bodies.

In my experience, the key to dealing with the real emotional issues is to stop dieting completely. It is then that you (and Oprah) can find true freedom from yo-yo dieting, hating your body and yourself, and address what you are really hungry for.

Not the Same Ol' New Year's Resolution

2009-01-06T22:13:00Z

Happy New Year!

Ah, the time of year for a New Year’s resolution. This year, I really will lose weight and get fit! I promise, I swear!

This year is the year - for real this time. How many times have I said that before?

The new year seems to give us a sense of renewal, starting over, and optimism for the future. We make resolutions in hopes of becoming a better person or more (in this case, less) of the person we want to be.

Exercising more and losing weight are often at the top of the list of New Year’s resolutions. Are they on your list? Have you made one or both of these resolution last year or the years before with some, little, or no success? Have you promised yourself that this year you will finally be successful, but you have no idea how? Often, changing our behaviors and patterns are a lot more complex than just resolving to do so. Therefore, I would like to offer some suggestions for working toward and actually accomplishing these goals.

Stop dieting. Your own personal experience, studies on diets and even diet ads that now say "results not typical" all tell us that diets don’t work! Yet, we keep trying and trying to use dieting to lose weight. Instead, we end up vilifying food, feeling bad about ourselves for eating forbidden foods and desiring these foods even more. This is a cycle that doesn't’t lead to weight loss; only to shame and more eating. Ending the diet cycle will bring freedom from the insanity dieting brings and can actually lead to weight loss that lasts a lifetime. It works because you start to eat to fuel your body rather than to feed your feelings.

Tackle change in several small steps rather than big leaps. Realistically, very small steps are more likely to bring more change than bigger steps. Set yourself up for success by choosing a small step that you know you can accomplish! For example, vow to walk only 5 extra minutes rather than increasing your walk by 30 minutes. Eventually, you will reach your 30 minute goal and it will be a new habit rather than a temporary push. In approaching change this way, you will feel good about your accomplishment and want to do it again. If the step is too big, you are more likely to feel the pang of failure – or pull a muscle - and give up.

Take the "exercise" out of the work out; make it fun instead. You are more likely to follow through on physical activity if you enjoy doing it. Choose an activity that is fun and that you love to do. For example, going to a dance class may be more fun than jogging or spinning and therefore, you are more likely to go back. This doesn't mean that you just have to find the perfect exercise, and it will then always be easy to go off into happy exercise land. A mild resistance once in a while is okay and normal. However, you want to find a physical activity that you enjoy, that you do because it is fun and rewarding… not because it will help you lose weight. It is then that you may actually want to exercise and enjoy its benefits.

Let exercise be an adult form of play. Whenever you next exercise, experiment with bringing play into your exercise: giggle during your play activity, bring your friends in to play with you, act like a child would if he or she were doing your activity - be creative, playful, have fun.

Explore the reasons behind the madness. If you resist exercise or hate your body, discover the underlying reasons. Pay attention to the feelings that come up when you eat or don’t eat, when you work out or don’t work out. Some of these feelings may have nothing to do with food or exercise. Talk to friends who know you well, journal, stop, sit, breath and feel, ask yourself "If it isn't about food, what might it really be about?" Overeating, under-exercising, and feeling bad about what you eat is rarely really about food; it is about how you feel about yourself.

If you are tired of promising yourself that you will finally lose the weight and keep it off but have tried every advertised method out there to do so with no lasting success, perhaps it is time to go the other direction. The suggestions above will help you do just that. Keep in mind, however, that some steps may not be easy. You may need some extra support, such as seeking the help of a friend, partner, family member, coach or a therapist who is trained in these particular issues.

Good luck to you in becoming the better you in 2009!

Tips for eating Thanksgiving dinner, not your feelings

2008-11-26T00:37:00Z

This can also apply to any meal with extended family...

Tips to eating turkey, not your feelings:

Depending on what time turkey dinner is served, eat a light breakfast - enough that you will be hungry for dinner but not too hungry. Keep in mind that if you are hungry for dinner, it will taste better. If, however, you are too hungry when you eat, you will tend to overeat and eat too fast to enjoy the food.

If your family is like many, there will be lots of food lying around before dinner starts. Do not snack on these before dinner; again, you want to feel hungry (at about a 3 on a 10 point scale) before dinner. However, if it looks good to you, consider saving some to eat during dinner. Wrap it up in a napkin, if you want. Often times, just knowing you can have the treat later, will diminish the need for it NOW.

Only put on your plate the foods you love. Challenge yourself to pass up the salad that your Aunt Suzy made just because you don’t want her to feel bad. This scenario is often an underlying issue for compulsive eaters and will only hurt you in the end.

Half way through your meal, stop eating and check in with your body. Notice where you are on the hunger scale (see my article "Put Your Hunger on the Scale" on my website). When you start to feel full, slow down or stop eating. Make sure you can take home leftovers. For example, ask your host for leftovers – "Mom, this turkey and gravy is DELICIOUS! I really want to eat more now but I am too full. Would you mind if I take some home to enjoy tomorrow?" Again, making this happen and reminding yourself of it can help ease your desire to continue eating the yummy food.

If you begin to feel overwhelmed with family, consider taking a walk, talking to someone you like, or even hiding out in the bathroom for a bit. It's often hard to let yourself feel the pain or sadness of a difficult interaction with family members. However if you do nothing but just be aware of your feelings, you'll ultimately feel better than if you lose control and have to cope with the added physical discomfort and emotional guilt of eating to cope with those family feelings.

Save room for pie! If your family is like mine, pie seems to come way too soon after dinner. Remember that you can always say, "I’m not hungry yet, I’ll wait to eat my slice later" and be sure your favorite is saved for you. Trust me, you will enjoy your pie more if you are hungry when you eat it.

Spend some time giving thanks and appreciation to yourself, your growth, people in your life, pets that you love. Create a new family ritual or just do this yourself or with friends.

Happy Thanksgiving! Enjoy your Thanksgiving dinner, yourself, and the people you spend it with! Thank you for being a part of a community that supports a healthy relationship with food and your body.

Junk Food Science- A Great Blog

2008-11-20T00:54:00Z

I have recently discovered a blog that speaks my language and that I think you will also appreciate. It is called Junkfood Science by Sandy Szwarc, BSN, RN, CCP who tells us about the research and information that no one else does.

In her bio, she says, "So much valuable and critically important information, and the very best science — well documented in careful, objective, evidence-based research — is never reported and almost never published. Fear sells and unfounded scares, exaggerations and “what-ifs?” are being used to terrify people about their foods, bodies and health."
We all have heard and continue to hear that if you are fat, you are unhealthy and more likely to get the "fat people" diseases. What if I told you this was simply not true. Would you believe me? Not to long ago, I wouldn't have believed it myself. But now, I know better.

The information we are told is just simply the information that gets published... what newspapers write about, what news stories inform us, what your doctor hears about, etc. There is a belief system in our society that if you are fat, you are more likely to die early, be diseased, and be generally more unhealthy. It is the crux to which we are sold the diet mentality. And, it is NOT TRUE.

Breaking down any belief system is difficult and takes time. The Junkfood Science blog helps do just that. She tells us about studies that won't be published, or talked about, or seen. They are real but they refute the belief system powerfully in place. And, quite frankly, refute those who make billions of dollars every year... the diet industry.

I encourage you to read her blog and to challenge your belief systems around this. Doing so may very well help you on the path to accepting your own body and food choices, to becoming more critical, to breaking down the beliefs that keep you dieting and thinking way too much about food and your body.

Out in Public

2008-11-03T23:50:00Z

A reader recently wrote a comment regarding avoiding events where food would be served or to which she feared she would be the largest woman in the room (see comment under title: You are an Eater). She had mentioned that she felt this was "crazy." Well, it isn't.

I believe a lot of people feel this way. I hear a lot from clients about how they are afraid to be around food... afraid others will judge them and their food choices, afraid they will lose control around the food, afraid to be judged negatively based on size especially when food is involved. These things do happen and are real. Unfortunately, right now, our society judges based on body size. Discrimination and prejudice are present.

But, you don't have to participate! It is hard not to. I know. I have to be careful myself not to judge myself and/or others. It is so accepted that I think we all do it. Be aware of it and catch yourself in the act. As soon as you do, change your thoughts. For example, if you catch yourself judging your body, "I can't be around people when I am this fat," notice it and change it. Perhaps you can change it to, "I have friends who like me and like being around me despite my size." It is true! You are NOT your size. You are so many other things. What are they? Name them, write them down, remember them and give yourself credit for them. Do the same if you catch yourself judging someone else. They are not their size either... who are they beyond that?

Doing so will help you to have more positive feelings toward yourself and will help with your relationship to food. As well, you will be helping society too! The more people that understand and fight against the prejudice and discrimination against fat people (or anyone who isn't thin), the better. Don't you think?

You are an Eater

2008-10-23T22:43:00Z

As men and women with food and body image challenges, we may learn to deny several parts of ourselves, including the part that eats. I think this is what diets teach us to do. Therefore, in order to heal your relationship to food and your body, you may need to reclaim your eater.

The below "Eaters Agreement" was taken from a passage in Marc David’s book Nourishing Wisdom. As you read it, I invite you to take this on… to really let yourself embrace the eater in you. Even if you tend to push it away after you read the passage, at least experience it fully while reading. See what it feels like to do so. And, if you wish, print it out, hang it up, and take it on each day from this day forward.

THE EATERS AGREEMENT

I hereby agree, from this day forward, to fully participate in life on earth. I agree to inhabit the appropriate vehicle for such participation--a body. As a requisite for the sustaining of that body, and of the life that dwells therein, I agree to be an eater. This agreement fully binds me for the duration of my stay on earth.

As an eater, I agree to hunger. I agree to have a body that needs food. I agree to eat food. I recognize that as the biological need to eat is fulfilled with greater awareness and efficiency, the benefits of my well-being will increase. I further acknowledge that ignorance of the eating process may cause undesirable consequences.

Because the essence of my participation in life is one of learning and exploration, I agree to experience uncertainty as an eater. I recognize there are a great variety of foods to choose from, and I may not know which to eat. I may have a choice of different nutritional approaches, and not know which to follow. I have an assortment of habits, and not know how to manage them. I recognize that my relationship to food is a learning process and I will inevitably make mistakes. Therefore, as an eater, I agree to accept my humanness and learn as I go along.

I acknowledge that as the body changes from infancy to old age, so will the eating process change. I recognize that my body may call for different foods as the days, seasons, and years progress. My dietary needs will also shift in accord with changes in my life-style and environment. I understand that there is no one perfect diet.

As an eater, I accept pain. I recognize that I may suffer pain when the body is disturbed by my choice of food or eating habits. I may also experience pain when emotional and spiritual hungers are confused with physical hunger. I further understand that eating to cure a pain that cannot be remedied by eating may bring even more pain.

I further agree to accept a body that is imperfect and vulnerable, that naturally decays with the passage of time. I recognize there will be moments when I am incapable of caring for it myself. I agree, then that to live in a body is to need the help of others. I also agree to be vulnerable as an eater. I acknowledge that I will be helpless when I am old and unwell. I further recognize that even when I am fully capable, I may still need the warmth and care of someone who can feed me. Therefore, as an eater, I agree to be nourished by others.

If I have a woman's body, I acknowledge that I have a special relationship to eating and nourishment. I recognize that as a giver of life, I am the nourished of life as well. Whether through my cooking or the milk of my body, I acknowledge that the union of food and love is a quality that marks my womanhood and has a profound effect on humankind.

As an eater, I acknowledge the domain of the sacred. I recognize that the act of eating may be ritualized and inspired. It may be given symbolic meanings that are religious or spiritual in nature. It may even be joyous.

I further agree that eating is an activity that joins me with all humanity. I recognize that to be an eater is to be accountable for the care of the earth and its resources. I acknowledge that despite our differences, we are all ultimately nourished by the same source. As such, I agree to share.

I recognize that at its deepest level eating is an affirmation of life. Each time I eat I agree somewhere inside to continue life on earth. I acknowledge that this choice to eat is a fundamental act of love and nourishment, a true celebration of my existence. As a human being on earth, I agree to be an eater. I choose life again and again and again...

From: Nourishing Wisdom, Marc David, Bell Tower, New York, 1991.

Resistance is not just a type of exercise

2008-09-22T23:44:00Z

Do you enjoy exercising? Do you have a physical activity that you just love and can’t wait to do? Or, do you wish you wanted to exercise - after all it will help you lose weight - but you can’t seem to get yourself to do it? Or, perhaps you yo-yo exercise - you exercise for a while and then, suddenly, you can’t bring yourself to go to the gym or jump on your bike again?

Many people have heard of compulsive (or addictive) exercising. This is a term used to describe someone who exercises too much and/or too often. For many who use compulsive exercise, it is a way to cope with feeling too full or as a way to control weight gain or to compensate for other areas where they feel out of control?

On the other end of the continuum is exercise resistance. Francie White, a dietician working with eating disorders in the Santa Barbara California area, coined the term Exercise Resistance. Although it is not widely recognized as a type of eating disorder or body image issue, I believe it is an important element to be explored.

Most of the women who have a resistance to exercise also tend to be emotional eaters, have a history of dieting and/or challenges with body image. In these individuals motivational strategies to encourage exercising fail and the thought of exercising is met with feelings of anger, anxiety and, well, resistance.

What are the risk factors?

A history with three or more diets. Individuals may actually be consciously or unconsciously responding to society’s emphasis on the ideal body as thin… as if to say, “I will not look the way you want me to look!”

Parents who forced or overemphasized exercising as a way to encourage their child to lose weight. Physical activity stops being play and becomes work and something to dread.

A history of sexual abuse for women or early onset puberty/development of large breasts. The sexual abuse could have occurred at any age or in any form and may even have occurred shortly after weight loss. In these cases, the individual may be attempting to prevent sexual attention or intimacy as a larger body size rarely receives unwanted sexual attention.

Do you think you resist exercise? If so, here are some questions to ask yourself:

When did being physically active change from being about play to being about “exercise”?

When did exercise become something you “should” do rather than simply a desire to move your body in a physical way?

Has physical activity ever been something you did to control your weight? If so, how did that change your view or feelings about exercise?

How did your feelings about exercise change after puberty?

Does being physically active relate to your feelings of sexuality? If so, how?

If you resist exercising, you may want to explore the underlying reasons for this. The above questions will help you do this. If you need support, talk to a therapist or other professional about it.

In addition, you may need to choose not to exercise for a while. The part of you that resists exercising has a voice too. Acknowledge it, explore the reasons, and give into it. In a way, you are telling that part of you, “I understand why you are here and that you have learned to dread exercising.” When you really give this part what it wants, it will eventually get tired of not moving, and will want an activity to engage in. After all, we have a natural, internal drive to move our bodies.

When you are ready to choose an exercise, pick something you really enjoy. For example, I don’t like going to a gym. With all the advertisements about, I feel distracted and sometimes bad about myself. I enjoy running but my ankle can’t take it and it really isn't something I look forward to doing. I finally found yoga. I love yoga and look forward to it. I love belly dancing too and have taken classes in the past. Both forms of activity feel great and I love to experience what my body can do.

What do you love to do? What is fun and playful, something you look forward to doing? This doesn’t mean it is always easy to go off into happy exercise land. A mild resistance once in a while is okay and normal. However, you want to find a physical activity that you enjoy, that you do because it is fun and rewarding… not because it will help you lose weight. It is then that you may actually want to exercise and enjoy its benefits: stress reduction, increased energy, feeling your body move, and enjoying your body’s strength and flexibility.

Let exercise be your adult form of play. Whenever you next exercise, experiment with bringing play into your exercise: giggle during your play activity, bring your friends in to play with you, act like a child would if they were doing your activity, be creative, playful.

If you find that you continue to resist exercise, you may want to seek the help of a professional. Remember, it may be more than just finding a coach to help motivate you. You may need to further explore your feelings about exercise and your body.